When they fade

Have you ever felt like a person just… slipped out of your life? One day, they’re there, laughing, sharing stories, supporting you through everything, and the next, they’re gone. Not because of a fight or a falling out, but just because they decided they no longer wanted to be part of your story. They just faded away.

It’s a weird feeling, isn’t it? The thought that someone who once meant so much to you could wake up one day and decide, I don’t need this person anymore. That realization that maybe, for reasons you’ll never fully understand, you weren’t enough anymore. And you wonder, How could I have missed it? How could something that felt so right, so good for so long, just collapse into nothing?

I’ve been there. And let me tell you—it doesn’t get easier. The nostalgia hits hard. You remember the late-night talks, the inside jokes, the way they had your back when everything was falling apart. There were moments when I thought, This is it. These friendships are forever.

But then, over time, things changed. People change. And what was once a safe haven can start to feel suffocating. The things you once accepted in the name of love or friendship suddenly feel like red flags. And that’s when you realize that what you thought was amazing was actually toxic. You see the cracks in the foundation, the little things that no longer serve you. It’s painful to admit, but you have to let go.

In the beginning, they were just strangers. You didn’t know them. They didn’t know you. But somehow, they made their way into your life. At first, it was small moments—passing conversations, awkward silences, things that didn’t seem significant at the time. But then, over the years, those moments grew into memories. They taught you things, showed you parts of yourself you didn’t know existed, made you feel like you belonged. You didn’t know it then, but those early moments, when you were strangers, were the seeds of everything that would follow.

And now, you’re stuck with all of it—the memories, the lessons, the pieces of them that are still scattered in the corners of your mind. The parts that made you who you are today. But they’re gone. And you’re left holding onto something that isn’t there anymore.

Letting go isn’t just about moving on. It’s about making peace with the parts of yourself that are tangled up in those relationships—the versions of you that grew in the presence of those people, the beliefs you formed because of them. When you realize that some relationships aren’t meant to last forever, the hardest part is accepting that they were meant to be temporary. And yet, this realization doesn’t make the process of letting go any easier.

What does it really mean to let go? To truly release a person, a memory, or even an expectation that once felt so integral to your life? The process of grieving these connections is more than just feeling sadness or loss—it’s about honoring what once was, recognizing the beauty in those moments, and accepting that those moments can coexist with moving forward. Sometimes, grieving isn’t about forgetting. It’s about learning to carry these memories as pieces of your past while freeing yourself from the weight of holding onto them.

It’s like standing in a room full of people you love, yet feeling completely alone. It’s the weight of knowing that some relationships are meant to be temporary—part of your journey but not your destination. It’s a feeling similar to receiving a letter you never get to read, left unopened in a closed mailbox. Sometimes, we hold onto things that aren’t meant to be delivered.But still, there’s a part of me that longs for those days. The days when we laughed until our stomachs hurt, when it felt like we could conquer the world together.

What’s harder than that is when someone cuts you out without warning. No explanation, no goodbye. One day, everything is fine, and the next, you’re just… gone. And you’re left wondering: What did I do wrong? Why was I so easily forgotten? It’s a gut-wrenching feeling—the terror of realizing that no matter how close you were, people can just walk away without a second thought. You wish that, maybe, if you had just one more conversation, one more chance to explain yourself, things might go back to normal. But the truth is—sometimes there’s no fixing it. People change. And that connection you once had is just gone.

And here’s where it gets tricky: sometimes, you don’t even get the luxury of closure. There’s no conversation that provides the answers you need. The absence isn’t something that can be solved with a simple dialogue or an explanation. And that’s where the challenge of truly letting go becomes even harder—because some pieces of that person, and that relationship, will always remain with you. The difficult part is finding peace with what you can’t change, and learning to honor the past while embracing the future.

I think there’s always that fear. The fear that one day, the people you love most will wake up and decide they don’t like you anymore. And it’s terrifying. You’ve given them so much of yourself, shared your deepest fears and biggest dreams, and in an instant, they can decide you’re not worth it anymore. You start questioning everything—your worth, your actions, your choices.

But here’s the thing: I’m slowly learning that this is part of life. Not everyone who comes into your life is meant to stay forever. Some people are there for a season, and when that season is over, it’s time to let them go. It doesn’t make it easier. It doesn’t make the pain go away. But maybe it helps to know that it’s not about you. It’s about them. Maybe they’ve grown in a way that no longer aligns with who you are, or vice versa.

And that’s okay. It’s okay to let go. It’s okay to acknowledge that some friendships were never meant to last, and that doesn’t take away from how beautiful they were while they lasted. Life is full of change, and sometimes the people who were once everything to you can become someone you need to leave behind.

I’m still figuring it out, honestly. It’s still hard. But I’m trying to focus on the future—the friendships and connections that are yet to be made. And the people who choose to stay, who want to grow with me, and who understand that life isn’t perfect, but it’s worth sharing with the right people.